COMICS-TV Stuff: Punisher the Movie
...at least they got the name right

So I'm hanging out at Wal-Mart....I mean, who DOESN'T hang out at Wal-Mart.. and I stumble upon their big 5.88 DVD blowout sale. I sift through the entire pile and dig out two comic book-related titles; "Batman: the Movie" (1960's) and "The Punisher". Less than six bucks? There's some actual COMICS that run higher than 6 bucks, so I continue my quest to pick up every Marvel or DC movie/TV show, no matter how shitty they may be.

Filmed in Australia by director Mark Goldblatt, "Punisher" was believed by Marvel execs to be their counter to DC's "Batman"- the biggest movie of 1989. The film stars Dolph Lundgren and Louis Gossett, Jr. This was Lundgren's second appearance as a cartoon/comic character, having starred in 1987's abysmal "Masters of the Univers" movie. At the time, Lundgren was still somewhat of a minor star, riding the coattails of his Ivan Drago role in "Rocky IV". Gossett was still a fairly marketable star as well. Despite his roles in "Firewalker", "Iron Eagle" and other B-movie action yarns, he was still best remembered for his outstanding role in "An Officer and a Gentleman" ("My GRANDMA wants to fly jets!!").

Furthermore, the Punisher was an incredibly popular comic commodity at the time. The character's first appearance in "Amazing Spider-Man" was THE hottest back issue of the late 80's. His guest appearances in "Daredevil" and the Spider-Man titles were always big events. Punisher received his own series around 1987, followed by a second series in 1988 ("Punisher War Journal"). Punisher faced off against Wolverine in 1989 in what became a huge sales monster for Marvel. On paper, at least, the "Punisher" movie seemed like printing money.

Something happened as the movie never hit the theatres and went straight to video. The movie was poorly received and became a laughingstock. Even Marvel, themselves, ridiculed the movie in a 1990 issue of their satire mag "What The-?!" But is the movie really THAT shitty?

The movie opens five years into the Punisher's career. Somewhat of an urban myth, the Punisher's exploits are covered by the media. He's never been cleanly photographed and marks all his victims with a specialized knife- one with a white skull on the hilt. A mob boss has just been released on parole, and the media immediately lets him know that the Punisher is after him. Punisher follows the guy home, kills him and explodes his mansion. Remarkably, the Punisher survives the explosion and disappears to his subterranean hideout.

In flashback, we're shown how Frank Castle became so ticked off at mobsters. They planted a car bomb that killed his wife and kids. Castle was also believed to have been killed in the explosion. We find out that the Punisher's an ex-cop, and the former partner of Louis Gossett Jr's character, Jake Berkowitz. Jake's been following the Punisher's little adventures for five years now. Jake suspects Frank Castle is the Punisher, but has no real evidence. Punisher wears all black, but does not wear the signature white skull chestpiece of his comic counnterpart.

The Punisher soon takes a backseat to your average mobster action. Mob boss Gianni Franco and his family are attacked by the Japanese Yakuza. The Punisher makes his token appearances at the gun fights, but the Yakuza-Franco dynamic is given more attention. The Yakuza then kidnaps all the offspring of Franco's mob in an attempt to gain their cooperation. Punisher saves the kids from the Yakuza in a scintillating car chases involving a bus. Speeds reach upwards of 35 MPH, so this scene may be too intesnse for young viewers.

Punisher is then captured by the police and has a face-to-face with Jake Berkowitz. Berkowitz is upset that Castle has ever asked him for help. Before Castle can be sentenced for 125 murder charges, he is freed by Franco's mob.

Franco's son is still being held captive by the Yakuza. Gianni and Punisher form a reluctant alliance and attack the Yakuza. Predictably, Franco and Punisher have a anti-climactic standoff invlving Franco's son. Franco is killed, but the Punisher escapes to continue his war on crime.

Problems galore with this movie. First, although this is supposed to be New York City, SEVERAL exterior shots have palm trees in them. Franco's son also slips into an Australian accent at times. Of course, the biggest obstacle with this movie is the change in the Punisher himself. No longer a Vietnam veteran, he's simply an ex-cop. In the comic, he had tons of Special Forces trainig, which explained the vicious and stoic nature with which he routinely killed folks. He also works alone, unlike his comic book counterpart who relied on cool shit and gadgets created by his partner Micro Chip. Here, he works with a homeless vagrant who rhymes like Etrigan the Demon at times.

Mobsters killed Castle's family in the comic, as well... but it was when the Castle family was caught in a mob crossfire while on a picnic. Also, the Punisher did not live in the sewers as the big screen version does. Maybe that was the Ninja Turtle influence... they were also big at the time.

Of course, the most noticeable change is the lack of Punny's signature white skull emblem. Punisher ALWAYS wore the white skull in the comics. In one story, he was marooned on an island, but still used a weird substance to mark his shirt with the skull. In this movie the skull only appears on gimmicked knife hilts! Imagine Superman or Batman without their signature emblems. Just wouldn't work. The white skull is an important part of Punisher's identity. Especialy ironic, when production notes mention that the director wanted to make things as "realistic as possible".

Perhaps the largest problem involves the plot itself. Too much attention is given to the Yakuza and the story becomes like any one of 4,000 Encore Action Movie features. Is there anything UNIQUE that would hook non-comic fans into the Punisher's world? No.. nothing they haven't seen in the standard late night HBO movie. Is there anything in this movie that would appeal to the comic fans? No.. this movie doesn't appeal to either and serves to drive BOTH sides away. Not a good thing.

Well, maybe it appeals to karate/kung-fu fans? Not really. Lundgren was supposedly picked for the role because of his background as a full contact karate champ. Two Yakuza bodyguards were picked for the same reason. Strangely enough, about 1/16 of the film involves these anticipated karate matches.

It's not a total trainwreck. The opening credits have the same effect as the White Stripes' "Seven Nation Army" video. Also, Lundgren's best line in the film inspired the band Biohazard to write their 1992 song "Punishment". But unfortunately, the action's nothing terribly unique or memorable. A 4 beer movie and only worth owning if you're an extreme comic-book movie completionist. Well, I do own the 1952 "Blackhawk" serials...

Finally, we should note that this is NOT the last time we'll see the Punisher on the big screen. A new and (supposedly) improved version is on the docket for 2004. Starring Thomas Jane (of Mickey Mantle/61* fame) as Frank Castle and John Travolta as the main bad guy, it's rumored to be closer to the Punisher's comic book roots.

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