Option 38 Stuff

Vs. Arizona Cardinals (W 37-20)
In baseball, when a team is struggling, players are sent down to Triple A Minor Leagues to get a tune-up and work on mechanics. Fortunately for the Broncos, the NFL has a Triple A built in to the regular season. It's called: Playing the Cardinals. Nobody on the roster gets offended by being "sent down" and no roster shuffling is involved. You simply go to Arizona, spend a weekend in the sun and work on your fundamentals. It's almost like being sent to a College Saucer Game, minus the gift-bags, curfews and payouts.

Jay Cutler worked on his passing touch and fired a perfect missile to an in-stride Javon Walker for a 54 yard TD. Champ Bailey worked on his interception drill by grabbing two picks. George Foster and the offensive line worked on their technique by grabbing opposing linemen. Mike Bell worked on his "fall head first" routine and only ended up backing into a pile four or five times. Quincy Morgan worked on getting his jersey dirty for the first time in 7 games, in addition to shaking the season-long kickoff return malaise.

In the most significant move of the day, Darrent Williams worked on his tan. Out with a "toe injury", Williams wasn't missed at all. Domonique Foxworth filled in fine at CB, while David Kircus actually gained more than Williams' usual 1 yard back-and-forth punt returns of utter futility. "Toe injury" would be technically correct, although not 100% accurate. It wasn't Williams' toe that was the problem. Due to Williams recent craptacular play, Mike Shanahan had broken his foot off in Williams' ass. They were simply unable to extract the toe.

It wasn't 100% rosy for the Broncos, though. Ding Dong #1 (Tatum) fumbled at the 10 yard line, allowing Cardinals Fat Guy Antonio Smith to skee-daddle in for a touchdown. The Broncos also failed to score a touchdown in the redzone during the first half, settling for field goals (their TD came long distance, from 54 yards out). What should have been a 28-10 halftime lead was only 16-10. In short, it was a good thing the Donkeys were playing the Cardinals. Any other team would've eaten them alive. The numbers improved to 3-for-3 in the second half, but the first half trips need to wield fruition in the coming weeks.

Cutler benefitted the most from the Triple A trip. With two touchdowns, he's now the third QB in NFL history to throw 2 TD passes in each of his first three games. The others were Charlie Conerly and Dan Marino (grey lining: both of those QB's combined for ZERO Super Bowl wins). Not that I knew and was aware of such a stat-- but that might amaze all three of you who don't know about the Internet. While the toss to Walker was excellent, it's tough to gauge Cutler at this point, considering the competition. He ran for a whopping 10 yards, but again it didn't answer any questions. In fact, he ran a QB draw that looked identical to last year's Bradlee Van Pelt TD run at Kansas City. Cutler has cited that he played two years as an option QB at Vanderbilt, so he's not entirely unexperienced to mobility. Sounds like I'm harping on a mild issue, but the Donkey offense is suited for a mobile QB.

It's also important to note that, in the second half, the Cardinals mildly exploited Denver's secondary. Larry Fitzgerald and Anquan Boldin were suddenly able to get open on 15-25 yard routes. The best the Cardinals could do, but once again something a superior team would use to run over the Donkeys. Yet the team left Arizona with a positive vibe, got back into the playoff seeding at #5 and decreased the number of suicide hotline callers in Bronco Country/Nation/Land/Miopia.

The math is simple: win the final two games and the Broncos are in the playoffs. Tough task considering Chad Johnson's TD receptions and TJ Housmanzadeh's vowels will be visiting Invesco Field next week (oh by the way, Chad Johnson -- it's NOT "Ocho Cinco". It's "Ochenta y Cinco"). The Bengals also have the former star of "Dolemite" in Rudi Johnson. Win those two and the Donkeys will be on the road to face either New England or Baltimore. Unless Indy falters and slips to the #3 seed. Then things are amazingly fucked. With two weeks to go, this mode of thought is definitely putting the cart before the donkey.

FINAL CUTS
...||...Here's a scary thought: imagine how many commercials Peyton Manning would be in, if he actually went to a Super Bowl.

...||...The Week Fourteen "my boy" award: Backup Safety Steven Gargille. I noticed his unfamiliar #38 jersey in the second quarter, then saw him in a good majority of special teams tackles.

...||...My Most Favoritest Commercial for this week: the Combos snack food spots. "What Your Mom Would Feed You. If Your Mom Were a Man".

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2006 Season Archive
August 11 vs Lions
August 19 vs Titans
August 27 vs Texans
August 31 vs Cardinals
September 10 vs Rams
September 17 vs Chiefs
September 24 vs Patriots
October 02 vs Bye Week
October 09 vs Ravens
October 15 vs Raiders
October 22 vs Browns
October 29 vs Colts
November 05 vs Steelers
November 12 vs Raiders
November 19 vs Chargers
November 24 vs Chiefs
December 03 vs Seahawks
December 10 vs Chargers
December 17 vs Cardinals
December 24 vs Bengals
December 31 vs 49ers
YEAR_END AWARDS