SPORTS-(BRONCOS)

vs. Kansas City Chiefs (W 27-11)
Typically, Arrowhead Stadium has been where Good Bronco Seasons go to die. So it was ironic that this year's field trip to the ugly parking lot off of I-70 actually produced a win, in what's become a Shitty Bronco Season. With the AFC Worst in its current state, the Donkeys now find themselves one game out of first, with a mighty 4-5 record.

Mindless fanatics will cream themselves and believe that this was a turning point for their beloved Broncos. Or, more likely, it could be that the Broncos have finally found a team that's having a shittier season than they are. With Larry Johnson currently out with an injury and Damon Huard at quarterback, the Chiefs fielded an unintimidating lineup. It was so bad that the Chiefs didn't do their usual dance-a-mania antics after every first down. The best thing the Chiefs Annoying Radio Douche got to holler was: "FIELD GOAL!! KAN-ZASSS CITYYYY!". Although, I wouldn't blame him for celebrating the Chiefs blocking a punt for a safety in the second quarter.

In the first half, it seemed like both teams were trying to out-crap each other and see who could fuck up the most. Damn Huard threw two INTs, while Jay Cutler had his own and even tried to throw through Chiefs DE Tamba Hali. This proves that Cutler still needs to spend alot of time in the classroom, as he looked right at a 6'3, 275 pound lineman and thought he could fire the ball through his chest.

The Donkeys trailed 6-8 at halftime, prompting a slew of baseball jokes. Yet the play calling was once again perplexing. Trailing 6-8, on the road and in a tight game, the Donkey offense ran 25 pass plays and 5 rushing plays. One of those runs was a QB sneak by Patrick Ramsey on 3rd and 1. That's more than a 3/1 pass-to-run ratio.... and they had SIX FUCKING POINTS to show for it. It's disgusting how much Mike Shanahan wants Jay Cutler to carry this team.

At halftime, the team must've gotten a TXT message or an email from a Pissed Off Fan Who Writes Weekly Recaps on a Shitty Website. After intercepting Huard again, the Donkeys...gasp....RAN the ball with Selvin Young. They didn't fake that ridiculous end-around play or force Cutler to throw over the middle. Whoa.. this even produced a.... rushing touchdown. Amazing how that works! When the Chiefs got the ball back, Elvis Dumervil forced a fumble that Nate Webster returned for a touchdown. Suddenly up 20-8 the Donkeys finally had room to breathe. Perhaps for the first time all season.

Young's performance (109 yards, 1 TD) puts Travis Henry's career in jeopardy. Yes, his career. Henry will most likely get suspended for a marijuana violation (someone call that dick Mason Tvert) and the Broncos will probably re-structure his contract and release him in March. The same way they released Simeon Rice this week, or Daryll Gardener in 2003. Young fits the mold of a darting runner fit for the system -- the ol' "one cut and go" thing. We haven't seen Young display strength going into a pile and fighting for short yards, though. But he seems to have better vision for finding the holes, something that Tatum Bell didn't have. He seems to have the moves of a Quentin Griffin and the "aceleration through the holes" traits of someone like... umm, Terrell Davis? Admittedly, that's a HUGE stretch.

Damon Huard soon had one of those conveinent "injuries" (translates to Shitty performance") and was benched for the up-and-coming Brodie Croyle. While Croyle looked better dropping back than Huard did, it was too little, too late. He led the Chiefs to a fieldgoal on his first drive, but that was it. It became so frustrating for the Chiefs that safety Bernard Pollard appeared to punch Brandon Marshall in the nuts on a flying tackle. Hopefully Marshall's reproduced already. Wear a cup, son. Although even a direct flying fist to the cup can hurt ya'. We need this injury to be analyzed and discussed on NFL Network. I'm sure it'd be more entertaining than crap like "top 10 punters of all time".

A therapuetic trip to Kansas City? This really has become a weird season.

Chop Blocks
...||... Just in time for the holiday feasting season: the Donkeys brought back Darrell Hackney. He's plump.

...||... The NFL is running commercials asking you to vote for the Pro Bowl. Why? I'll vote for the Pro Bowl as soon as 50% of the participants stop pulling out of the game, annually. Dan Marino was elected to roughly 8 or 10 Pro Bowls and showed up for maybe one or two. By logging onto the NFL's website (or voting on your phone), you're doing nothing but generating more exposure for each outlet, via increased page loads and possible advertising click-throughs. Don't do it.

...||... That little girl in the Ford Escape commerical is hella' creepy. The commercial where she asks her dad if he's driving a "hybrid hybrid". Maybe it's her manly shoulders or stiff demeanor, but she's one scary little broad.

...||... General Motors fulfills their multi-cultural requirement. In that "Our Country" comemrcial that cuts a slideshow of "GM Trucks Through Time"; in every scene, they make sure to include an African-American.

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2007 Season Archive
August 13 vs 49ers
August 18 vs Cowboys
August 25 vs. Browns
August 30 vs. Cardinals
September 9 vs. Bills
September 16 vs.Raiders September 23 vs Jaguars
September 30 vs Colts
October 7 vs Chargers
October 21 vs Steelers
October 29 vs Packers
November 4 vs Lions
November 11 vs Chiefs
November 19 vs Titans
November 25 vs Bears
December 2 vs Raiders
December 9 vs Chiefs