G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero #95

“Snake Eyes Trilogy Part 2: No Turning Back”

Writer: Larry Hama
Pencilers: M.D. Bright

Summary:

The basement of the Cobra Consulate building, the Baroness turns over Snake-Eyes to the Paine Brothers. But Destro arrives, so Baroness departs to meet him and tries to deny that Snake-Eyes is in the basement. Snake-Eyes overcomes the Paine Brothers and works his way up the building. People are evacuated, so Snake-Eyes blows up the middle floors and leaves the Baroness trapped on the top. Across the street, Storm Shadow, Stalker and Wade Collins observe everything.

Meanwhile, Scarlett is being flown back from Switzerland. Doc confirms that the bullet only hit the dome of her skull and was deflected somewhat (oh c’mon!!!!), as a result she’s in a coma. Roadblock and Chuckles stay in Switzerland to razz Dr. Hundtkinder a bit.

In an epilogue, the “Blind Master” (Zartan) and Tyrone arrive at an unmarked grave to meet Billy and Raptor. Zartan gives a little speech about vengeance being a never-ending cycle. Billy then points the finger at the current Cobra Commander (Fred VII)….who they’re all pissed at. They’d be doing the world a favor by taking him out.

Notes:

• Important to note that Billy and Raptor do NOT dig up the grave. Although they were about to, until Zartan and Tyrone arrived.
• The cover to this issue is kinda’ neat. But it shows Snake-Eyes in front of the Cobra airborne logo. The one with the little wings added to the Cobra sigil. No idea why they did that.
• Snake-Eyes’ face is fully repaired. But, as he’s figthing the Paine Brothers, he receives a cauldron full of hoat coals to his grill, scarring him once again.
• Snake-Eyes presumably killed the three Paine Brothers…but Devil’s Due for no good reason whatsoever liked to list them as alive. They were worthless, disposable characters who served their purpose: Snake-Eyes beat them up and took their gear as his new costume.
• I felt slapped in the face that Scarlett was presumably “killed” last issue. It really affected me. So to say that the bullet bounced off her skull at point-blank range and that she’s still alive is another slap in the face.
• Official first appearance of Snake-Eyes version 3 (his 1989 action figure). Although he had appeared in this costume on the cover of issue 91. But covers can never be considered “in canon” for any title.
• Stalker, Storm Shadow and Wade are hiding out in Sarge’s newstand, from Special Missions #7.
• Wade walks into the Consulate’s lobby, in his old Crimson Guard fatigues. In one panel, he changes from the CG outfit to his old LRP gear, underneath his clothes, complete with helmet and weaponry.
• At the newsstand, no less than…J. Jonah Jameson walks by and complains why the Daily Bugle isn’t on sale. Draw your own conclusions about the boundaries between “universes” again. He’s not named or addressed as “JJJ”, but he’s fully intended to be him. Uber-fan explanation: “this is the JJJ of the GI Joe Universe. There just happens to be a JJJ who also publishes a Daily Bugle. But there are still no superheroes in this world”.
• I rank “JJJ’s” appearance as one of those “unofficial” cameo crossovers, similar to what DC and Marvel would do in their stories about Tom Fagan’s Halloween Party in the 70’s.
• The letters page adresses Cobra’s seemingly “unrealistic” practices. In additionto selling arms, they have the pyramid schemes, plus insider trading and hostile takeovers. Broca Beach was based off coastal British towns in WWII, where weapons were “hidden” in an amusement park. They also mention that, according the NY Times, the Russians really WERE broadcasting some form of waves at the US (see issues 2, 68 and Special Missions 20).

Appearances:

Characters (figures): Hawk, Snake-Eyes, Scarlett, Stalker , Storm Shadow, Chuckles, Roadblock, Doc, Lifeline, Baroness, Destro, Zartan (as Blind Master), Raptor

Characters (“comic-only”): Dr. Hundtkinder, Billy, “Sarge”, Tyrone, Paine Brothers (Crispo, DeSade, Torquemada), Wade Collins, “J. Jonah Jameson”

Vehicles and stuff (toys): none

Vehicles and stuff (not toys): GI Joe C-130, Cobra gunship/transport copter

Firsties:
Characters: Paine Brothers

Vehicles and stuff: none

Rating: 3 Flag Points